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“Not Just an Education… A Career!”

Ouch, I just hurt mysefl laughing… The folks at J-Walk blog have done it again.

Find out all about Spam University, ” the world’s top-rated educational institution for the growing spam industry.”

Under Admissions:

Spam University receives thousands of applications every month.

Regretfully, we can’t accept everyone who applies. Consequently, we have stringent requirements for acceptance.

We’ve found that the best Spam U students have the following characteristics:

* Attended at least four years of elementary school.
* No more than three felony convictions
* The ability to count to 20 without removing your socks
* Toilet-trained (at least for #2)
* No more than 36 tattoos
* Familiarity with computers (i.e., you’ve seen one in a store or on TV)

If you meet these qualifications, we encourage you to apply. Even if you don’t meet these qualification, you should apply anyway. You never know…

Check out the Courses, the Camus, Alumni, Athletics, and more. And a re-assuring privacy statement:

We at Spam University respect your privacy. Yeah, right. We respect it about as far as we can throw it.

We collect as much personal information as we possibly can. We use cookies, brownies, Twinkies, infrared sensing and hidden cameras. Whatever it takes to find out about you and your pathetic Web surfing habits. Oh yeah, and several different spyware programs have been installed on your system.

By viewing this page, you agree that we can do whatever we damn well please with your personal information. Sell it. Give it away. Trade it for cheap beer. Auction it on eBay. Give it to our “partners.” Whatever. You also agree that we can kill you, if the need arises, and sell your body parts on the black market. And we can use your car anytime we want.

I bet they teach you how to write blogCommentSpam, with an advanced graduate seminar on TrackBack inflitration.

Profile Picture for Alan Levine aka CogDog
An early 90s builder of the web and blogging Alan Levine barks at CogDogBlog.com on web storytelling (#ds106 #4life), photography, bending WordPress, and serendipity in the infinite internet river. He thinks it's weird to write about himself in the third person.