First my body was physically demoralized by a brutal bike ride and yesterday it was my computer’s turn to beat me down.
Without going into banal details no one cares about, I pretty much spent 4 hours Sunday night, and most of the day MOnday battling with a problem on my aging MacBookPro (a 2009 mid year model), the software I use to manage my photos (Aperture), and what finally turned out to be the culprit, a malfunctioning LaCie external hard drive.
It’s only technology, and computers, and not who you are, or your life.
Still– my career, reputation, most of what I have devoted my last 20 years to, are tied up in these machines. And when repeated effort after effort failed to resolve it, man it got me down. It’s been a while since it was that bad (a few years ago when a major web site rollout failed miserably). Plus it was the pressure of trying to get my computer to work as it should so I could do all the things I need to get done, when instead I was trying to rebuild aperture libraries, recover files from a crashed hard disk, resorting to recovering the source images that were erased from the camera data card…
But what it really knocked me because it was keeping me form doing what I enjoy the most, editing and sharing my photos.
Perspective was called for. At 4pm I walked out the door with the camera to wander in the woods.
usually finding the right light, detail in a photo lifts me from a funk. I found a few, under the deep blue Arizona skies, and sharp later afternoon light
As I was bushwhacking off trail, I was aware, and saw blurs of, and eventually the bugling of a herd of elk. I could not get close enough for a photo, but the experience was better.
I got out into the neighborhood, and spotted this brilliant shot of a squirrel munching away on top of a house sign. The light had framed him perfectly, just a few feet away. My slow motion to get the camera off my shoulder was latre, he hopped off before I got the photo.
At least I captured it in my brain camera.
The flowers usually abide
Yes, I know what is important and what is not. But still it can get to you. And it helps actually to have this feeling, as a place of empathy for people who struggle with technology, who loathe it, who feel crushed by it. I do not usually feel this way, but it is humbling to be reminded of it.
Like biking, there is only one way to go but up.