Dog turds and clickbait are a match.
Follow my story.
Yesterday I was in Payson, the “big” town nearest me (~15,000 people, where there is a Home Depot,
Walmart, Safeway, doctors, fast food, hospital, maybe one good coffee shop.
I had a string of appointments lined up.
There was one I could not schedule was for today. I got a card that Felix needed a shot and parasite test at the veterinarian. I had switched to a new one at his one year anniversary.
So one of my appointments went quicker than I thought, and I had 40 minutes before getting my truck in for an oil change / tire rotation at Big O. So I took Felix for a walk in the neighborhood around the hospital.
Right in front of the Mormon church adjacent to the hospital, Felix stopped and took a big dump right on their manicured bushes.
My dog crapped on a church.
In my wooded neighborhood, I usually leave his deposits to do their biological breakdown, but in more populated areas I try to be conscientious and carry a bag.
I looked around.
I should be a good citizen.
A lady called out from a car in the street.
“Do you have a bag?”
“No, I will have to go back to my truck to get one. Do you have one?”
She shook her head no. Was she being snoopy or helpful?
So I walked back to my truck. I could just leave easily.
Then I remembered I needed a “sample” for Felix’s vet appointment, so it made sense to not only clean up, I could even walk over today and drop his stool sample off at the vet.
I got my bag and sample.
We walked to the vet office, and dropped the sample. They asked me if I wanted it to go out today, which meant I had to pay for it. Then the lady at the desk said, “I don’t see your appointment in the computer.”
Click. Click. Click. Click.
“I’m sure it was for 11:30am” I said.
She said, well we could do it at 10:30am.
“What is the appointment for?” she asked. “You were just here a month ago.”
“I think it was the diptheria shot and a fecal test.”
She said, “You are up to date on everything, the shot you got is good for 3 years.”
“But I got the reminder card from Payson Pet Care.”
“This is not Payson Pet Care!”
Then it made sense. I got the card reminder from Felix’s old vet. I called the number thinking it was the new one.
I did not need an appointment and they did not need my bag of dog poop.
So this is trivial, but if Felix had not crapped at a church, if I had not brought it to my new vet, today I would have shown up there for an appointment I made at another office that I did not even need.
A string of “because this happened, this happened, than that happened.”
This story is about dog poop but it’s not.
It’s how a series of linked events starting with shit can toggle into something that works out beautifully.
And something two people in a veterinarian’s office can laugh at, now and in the future.
I want a life full of crazy sequences like this, not pre-planned data driven experiences “that dovetail into some company’s ‘heartbeat'”
I’ll take dog shit over big data any day.