The first word in that there blog post title is not a verb, not a command, but a noun. An improper noun that is the name of a commercial megamonster corporation that exists to extract more or less Matrix like, the life of its puny little customers.
I’ll start from the end, a review in Google Maps, and weave my way back. But hang around for the story, eh?
In 1987 I made my own young adult epic journey, driving across the US from my home town of Baltimore, ending up in Tempe, Arizona to start my masters program in Geology at Arizona State University. Sometime in those first days, I walked from campus over to the iconic branch of Valley National Bank on the corner of Apache Blvd and Rural Rd. The iconic feature of the bank was it’s unique “gold domed” architecture (though I recall it was painted white, maybe I am wrong).
Valley National Bank served the Valley from its founding in 1900 through 1992. During this time, the Bank’s distinctive logo was a common sight throughout the Valley. Its branches often had an iconic architectural design.
Located at the corner of Apache and Rural, the Tempe branch was constructed in 1962 by local architects Weaver & Drover. Many people remember this particular location for the unique design of the building’s roof: a gold geodesic dome that R. Buckminster Fuller designed. This unique design choice by the Valley National Bank was a response to the changing architectural trends in the Phoenix Metro Area.
From Salt River Stories, https://saltriverstories.org/items/show/256
I did not know until now that my first bank in Arizona was a Bucky Dome!
Because of progress, Valley National Bank was gobbled in 1992 by BankOne and that in turn was eaten by a bigger fish, by merging with Chase Bank in 2004. I left ASU in 1992 but kept that same checking account, switching it to the Payson branch when I moved “up on the Rim” in 2008. And I kept the account in 2018 when I moved to Canada, it was handy to maintain a US bank account for some transactions (like getting paid by my US located organization I( worked online for), and I piled a bit on my Chase Credit Card.
Until last December, I was able to easily manage money by my work checks deposited into my Chase account, and doing wired through online banking to my Canadian bank account.
I maintained the same checking account for 37 years and even now I can quickly recite the same account number… I had.
Without any notice, in February of this year I got a stranged letter in the postal mail. It was a check and a notice that my Chase checking account, the 37 year old one, had been closed.
Who closed it? I called the service number, and spoke to a very uncaring and rude “Customer Care” rep who told me repeatedly that because of the terms of the bank agreement, Chase bank could terminate my account at any time. Without reason. And without notice. I never got an email, a letter, a note in the app.
When I asked for reasons or even tried to use my “30+ years of being a customer” the “Care” rep just repeatedly read me the terms of the agreement.
I decided to leave Chase bank a review in Google Maps.
This is something I started a few years ago, I found it an effective way to express appreciation for local businesses that gave good service, like a review for Paws ‘n Claws, where I board Felix, a mason who fixed our old brick chimney, the veterinary clinic where I take our pets, even a restaurant in Montana we enjoyed a great meal on our road trip last summer. It’s meaningful as many small and medium businesses value this and often reply. It seems like adding photos generate more views, according to The Google, but that’s not my goal.
I had nothing complimentary to say about Chase Bank, so I unleashed the lowest review I could use (they need something lower than one star).
Without being notified, my Chase checking account at the Payson, Arizona branch was closed in December. I only discovered this when a check arrived in the mail in February 2025 indicating my account was closed. They did not email me or call the active contacts in my account. I phoned the 1-800 customer service number and was treated like a child by a rude agent who refused to express any understanding, stated that they would not nor do not have to give a reason, and only repeatedly read to me the terms of services that said a bank could close my account at any time
In fact this agent lied as she stated my account was closed by the branch. Later when I called the branch the manager told me they did NOT close my account.
I have had the same account since the days I as an ASU grad student, in 1986 when I opened it at the old Valley National Bank in Tempe, the one with the dome on it adjacent to campus. I have the account number memorized 40 years later and stayed with the bank when Chase bought this bank, and continued to be a Chase customer when I moved to Strawberry, Arizpna in 2008.
I have con continued to all my banking at Chase (I also have a Chase credit card) after moving to Canada in 2018 as my employer is US based. The branch was very helpful when I changed my mailing address to where I live now in Canada and was assured there would be no problem banking there while I was living abroad as a US citizen
There was not one shred of any understanding or compassion from the agent I spoke to, and she talked to me as if I was a child. I understand the days are long gone when customer service was a reality, that we are just pieces of a large corporate machine just extracting fees from us.
I urge anyone reading this to not give your business to Chase, go to a bank that cares, if there are any left. The one star rating is only left because that is the lowest option.
My raving Google Maps review of Chase Bank
I’ve not gotten any response from the business owner. Shrug.
I did leave a positive one for the Chase Branch in Payson where the bank manager did listen with concern and assured me that the bank branch did not close my account (i originally left the scathing review for the branch, but that was misplaced)
I am pleased to update the negative review below because a few days ago I called this Chase Branch and had the pleasure of being listened to be a very helpful representative named Lisa.
She assured me that the branch definitely did not close my account, that this was done by the central system. This means the Chase agent I spoke to originally lied when she claimed my branch closed the account.
Not only did Lisa clarify this for me, she also went the extra mile and spent a bit of time researching how I might be able to make payments from Canada on my Chase Credit card, something out of her realm of responsibility. This my review of this branch is very high, and I will copy my original review and place it where it belongs with the corporate office in Delaware.
My Google Maps Review of the Chase Bank Branch in Payson, AZ
I know that this is all for naught as the operations of MegaCorps like JPMorgan Chase run by steamrolling over the petty concerns of its puny customers. How can one expect otherwise for a company named after one of the king robber barons. But at least I can paint them some shame in public. Even it has no effect, it just feels good.
And I still cannot erase my old checking account number from my memory banks.
Featured Image: In honor of my opinionated Mom, I remixed a photo of her giving a thumbs down to a Wired Magazine issue — Mom Gives Thumbs Down on Wired’s Editorial Decision Making flickr photo by cogdogblog shared under a Creative Commons (BY 2.0) license — by overlaying the magazine cover with my Google Maps review of Chase bank.
Not a comment about the story (boo Chase), but that photo of the geodesic building! It reminded me of this rad dome Amanda once designed and built with a team for a festival here in Edmonton. I believe the pattern they designed originated from hypotrochoid patterns, but it was long enough ago that my memory may be vague. Anyhoo, figured you would appreciate another cool dome and hopefully that adds a perk to the day. https://amandanogier.com/about/