It’s been a month since I drove a stake through the heart of my Facebook account. Life feels pretty much the same.

My process was not the most well thought out- I posted a status, and nuked the account an hour later, so who knows what replies I missed? My sister claims she saw a reply from Mark Zuckerburg; then again, she used to toss the Monopoly board in the air when I got ahead.

I happened to glance at my Google+ status and saw some comments from folks related to this. I think it was my comment to something else… just like Google+ I cannot find them again. But that’s another bowl of slimy vegetables.

Let me be clear. My reasons for leaving are mostly a gut sense of distrust for Facebook, and I am the first one to apply the hypocrite badge to myself for why should I trust Google, Twitter, Flickr, and more?

It’s not exactly distrust. It’s more that… I just don’t like Facebook.

Which you cannot do in a world were the only option is “Like”. Like… Candyland. Pleasantville.

Let me be clear, my not liking Facebook is all about me. Not you. Yet the typical reaction I see among “friends” is a rationalization.

“Everyone is there.”

“Sure it’s silly and frivolous.”

“It’s the only way to keep tabs on friends and family”

I almost expect to see “I can quit at any time”.

A lot of them seem to be like “I know it’s creepy/etc but…” To me, often it ends up sounding defensive.

And it is not the only way to stay in touch. Facebook has not subsumed the entire realm of ways we communicate.

Let me be clear. I do not criticize anyone for using Facebook. That is not my message. Why do you feel a need to defend your reason for using Facebook? That seems curious.

And hey, Remember? My decision is all about me.

Here is the thing. I don’t like beets. They are slimy and the thought of eating them makes me want to puke. That’s me.

You may love beets. Borscht.

Do you feel like you have to defend your love of beets to me?

I did not think so.

I can think of a few people, real friends, not one-button-click-friends. I saw constant statusing in Facebook whom I never hear from, who have ignored messages, emails from me. It sure seems like everyone is Bizy Backson


And it’s not like I going all Turkle on y’all. It’s not like I want only Serious Pontifications online (have you seen my tweets? really?). I embrace the frivolity, the silliness of online spaces. Yet I also crave the real personal communications that come from phone calls, personal texts, letters — that seem more rare every day. Someone in that G+ comment string was a friend I have not hear from in 2 years. Are status messages the only way I will every hear from you again?

I want both in my life.

There were things I enjoyed seeing and commenting on in Facebook. I got the glimpses into some distant family’s lives (not all were pretty). A visit last January with my cousin happened via Facebook messages.

What I saw mostly in Facebook was mostly the stream, now the torrent of micro-ness.

And it bored me. And saddened me. But yeah, I got bored by the sameness of it all. I tried several ways to shake up the Facebook status quo. For a while I tried Liking Everything. Then for 3 months, I refused to Like Anything, leaving genuine comments.

Now I know what it is.

Everyone (a.k.a “everyone Who is in Facebook”) seems to accept the Ultimate Inevitability of Facebook.

I do not.

My choice to kill the account is not about you and what you do, it is my own experiment. You do not have to defend your use of Facebook, much less than you need to defend your joy of slimy puke inducing vegetables.

creative commons licensed ( BY ) flickr photo shared by jumpinjimmyjava

I may be the Only Person Not on Facebook.

And that is Ok.

It has nothing to do with you.

And I still do not like beets.

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An early 90s builder of web stuff and blogging Alan Levine barks at on web storytelling (#ds106 #4life), photography, bending WordPress, and serendipity in the infinite internet river. He thinks it's weird to write about himself in the third person. And he is 100% into the Fediverse (or tells himself so) Tooting as


  1. That’s ok, little bro! Your big sister, the teacher is not on Facebook either! I am the one who still writes letters and enjoys talking face to face or on the phone. Texts are good too but I tend to be long winded as I talk too much! It’s not for everyone so we will have to find out about each other the old fashioned way… and that is fine with me! 🙂

  2. Well, I think that Facebook caught on because it was the first and only easy way for people to have a webpage on the Internet about them.

    Plus, Facebook connects you up with all the people, so you don’t really have to be saying anything useful, you just have to be saying something. And then they can all see it and like it.

    You don’t really have to think much before posting on Facebook, and so it’s easy for things like pictures and stuff. But it’s not like blogging, where you have to think about what you’re going to write about, and what is a good title, and what kind of headings to use, and what kind of pictures, and all the CC attributions. Plus you have to let people know so that they can read it. It’s not just like stuff that comes through their brain without them thinking about it, they have to actually come to your blog because RSS is dying. Which is a bad thing.

    So, I think that Facebook is like a river that comes right to your house, even if there’s a flood which sometimes gets sewage in it. And that is not a good thing. So I think you maybe didn’t like all the sewage of Facebook.

  3. But, Beets! I like beets! It’s okay that you don’t like beets.

    But maybe you have never tried pickled beets?
    Maybe you would like pickled beets?
    Have you ever tried pickled beets?
    Maybe they would be a tasty that you like!
    Why don’t you try some?

    Personally, I would not put beets and Facebook in the same category, because you’re probably not get beets coming to your house in a river, even if there was a flood.

    Plus, you live on a mountain anyway.

    Well, bye!

  4. Facebook is controversial across a wide swath of humanity. Beets are not. We call that a false analogy in WR 122 circles. You are putting forth a claim and attaching reasons. I see on G+ people counterclaiming you and attaching THEIR reasons…maybe not perfectly but certainly at an effort at rational argumentation. That doesn’t make either party defensive, necessarily.

  5. Alan,
    Can’t disagree about FB, but beets, you are doing them wrong.
    I’d suggest, fresh, smallish ones, boiled in skins, skinned and roasted with olive oil and red onions. A wee bit of balsamic vinegar when the come out of the oven and perhaps some walnuts.
    If this seems like too much work to test something you don’t like come for dinner.

  6. I really did see a comment from Zuckerberg. I thought it was one of your techy friends pulling a joke. Now it makes me sad that you won’t see all of my bragging and complaining on FB! Roasted beets are really good but beets are messy to cut up.

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